Well Howdy Doodie Gamers  and Gametes ,

 

What a month August has been  it all started when my Ooman decided because of all the good weather we were having , He was gonna get the old motorbike out  dust away the cobwebs ,hook up the bike trailer box and head out to the open road for a bit of camping.

Now he didn’t have to say that twice, Off I went to find me leather jacket and me helmet, You’ve all heard of sons of anarchy, well I’m more your son of anchovy ,

So I had found me travelling attire and went to see how far the ooman had got with the packing.

I found him holding a clip board  going through his list, Tent tick, sleeping bags tick lamps tick pot ,pans and kettle tick packet dog food tick,  Now by this time I was beginning to think we would be better just tying a chain round the house and hooking that to the bike, The amount of stuff he was taking.

 

After about another hour and a half of his faffing he eventually locked down the trailer box and hooked it to the bike.

He then went off to put some travelling gear on which comprised of a pair of camo shorts, A tee shirt, and his leather jacket , He looked like a member of S club 7 honestly I thought well that’s enough to chase anything away  , give you nightmares that would lol.

 

Eventually it was hey ho and of we go making our way to the open roads, clean air, and some fishing. I couldn’t wait to get to the camping park, I was thinking of all the fun I would have exploring. Maybe meet a nice lady dog or two.

We arrived just before 15:00 hours and got to work setting up our camp , well my ooman did I went scouting for wood for the fire so there was I dragging back huge branches, good job Mr  camping King brought his cordless saw with him so he could cut these big things down, I had made three or four journey’s when I noticed some wild mushrooms , I thought  I will collect some of those for tea, so I dropped off my last lot of wood and picked up me water bucket to fill with mushrooms.

 

My bucket was about half full when I began to feel some warm air on my nether regions , turning very slowly I came face to face with the biggest Momma bear I ever seen, All of a sudden without warning this colossal thing scooped me up in her furry arms and they would have gave Mr Universe a run for his money, Huge they were, I thought I wouldn’t want a clip round the ear with one of those.

 

So there I was on me back little legs in the air being licked washed by this momster, but one thing was for sure she wasn’t getting me mushrooms I held on to me bucket like me life depended on it. The way she was walking she was heading straight for our comp , right I thought my ooman will save me, but when he saw what was happening he took out his phone and started videoing he was laughing so hard at the sight of me he had tears yes real tears streaming down his face.

 

After he had, had a good giggle to himself he eventually went into the tent and picked up his hunting rifle came out and fired two shots into the air which caused a mass exodus from the surrounding trees and those squirrel things were not happy, The good thing it had also frightened the bear and she dropped me and  could have qualified for the two minute mile the rate of knots she was going.

 

With me nerves all shattered from that experience I decided to chill out and do some fishing (What could possibly go wrong) His nibs who had decided to join me found a good spot and we settled down for some good fish catching,

 

Ten minutes not a bite  I was beginning to this the fishes had gone away on their hoilidays too, when suddenly his nibs shouts out “I got a bite here and it’s huge “ I think he had caught a relative of old jaws the way he were dancing about, but then I saw jut what was caught on the end of his hook and it weren’t no fish, This had 4 legs a long snout and a very long thick tail, goes by the name of Ali second name Gator, I* wasn’[t waiting around to see how that was gonna pan out oh no I was off like a whippet chasin a hare up that bank, into the tent, grabbed me helmet and jacket and was on the motor bike quicker than his nibs could say RUN!

 

He was bringing up the rear with Mr gator not far behind, he grabbed what he needed and practically fell on the bike, with on turn and jump the bike came to life , gears engaged we flew down that road towards the gate like the hounds of hell were after us, I swear he was one wheeling it, Evil Kineavil would have been proud I’m sure.

 

We made it to the camp gates just in time to see Ali Gator about turning to go back to his home without his lunch I’m pleased to say.

We arrived back at our house in the early hours of the morning boy was I glad to see it, once we got a cup of tea his nibs announced that next time we will go camping at the beach , but then I had a think and there are SHARKS in them there seas  , Jaws family NOPE no beach for me in fact you what? It’s right There is no place like HOME!.

 

See you all next month,

 

LOVz NUGGETxxxxx